By Colby Malsbury

It would be hilarious if it weren’t so painfully obvious and stilted.

Not even a week after national security adviser/amateur soothsayer Jake Sullivan cooed that the Middle East was at its quietest since 9/11, Israel engaged in the utterly thinkable and wrought yet another botched attempt to drive Amalek – whom you might be better acquainted with as ‘Palestine’ – into the sea. It’s a generational rite of passage at this point in history, emerging like clockwork every ten years like a Red Sox pennant race or a Rothschild-financed ‘grassroots protest movement’ that’s gonna topple the existing globalist regime for one and all times.

So yeah, this is nothing at all new. But the difference this time is: this is the first major Semitic skirmish to take place in the Twitter-dominant era, when immediacy is king, emotionalism reigns over all else, and AI-doctoring increasingly renders all viral vids utterly useless. And since there is no such thing as historical context anymore, the aura that percolates in such a climate is one of inevitable, irretrievable, catastrophic dispensationalist doom. Netanyahu and Kenneth Copeland are both licking their chops at the illicit gains that will be flowing into their coffers as a result of this, but everyone else is despondent.

This is also not new in terms of how disgusting the entire escapade is – witness both the sycophancy demonstrated towards our Greatest Ally yet again from our alleged ‘right-wing’ compadres, and the genocidal acts Israel once again foists upon a Palestinian populace guilty of the high crime of existence….many of which Palestinians are also Christians, it needs to be said. Oh, how our supposed ‘friends’ cavilled away when it was first reported that Israel had deliberately struck a hospital in Gaza – a Baptist hospital, yet – and, oh! How they cheered when the legacy media came together and assured us that no, it was an errant missile from Hamas heading towards Israel that had eliminated 500 casualties¹, and what else could one expect from sociopathic goat-herders who only want to drive Israel into the sea because they don’t believe the Bible, and are atheists, or something? Watching them bray like victorious asses when their false presuppositions were affirmed by the same press that just got done lying to them about Covid and Ukraine relentlessly these three years gone was a disheartening sight indeed, though not a surprising one, in all honesty. Of course, there was no acknowledgement of wrongthink on their part once it was revealed that the strike likely came from an Israeli drone (as reported on Judging Freedom With Andrew Napolitano – begin at 1:10), nor when a subsequent – and “coincidental” – strike on an ancient Greek Orthodox church was far more readily acknowledged to be an Israeli one. These are the same people who have been ridiculing 9/11 truthers for decades now because they want to be on the right side of the Hegelian dialectic distortion of history. Sure glad we made common cause with these Judases during lockdown. That relationship is paying dividends now.

And, because the Online Rite are chronic repeaters of history because they refuse to learn any of it from sources other than Max Boot, Steven Spielberg, and Fiddler on the Roof, the Christians among them are back to proselytizing the same old tired and disproved dispensationalist garbage about ‘end-times prophetical fulfillment’ that has been going on since John Nelson Darby began giving Joseph Smith a run for his money in the ‘false pseudo-Christian prophet’ sweepstakes. “A conflagration in the Holy Land??? That can only mean that the Rapture is nigh!!!!!” Sure thing, chief. Just like the Rapture was nigh in 1948, 1956, 1967, 1973, 1982, 1995, 2001, 2006, and 2013, right? How do you propose to keep this ‘Great Mystery’ of yours a secret that ‘all the world will marvel at’ if you keep making a habit of false starts before the opening gun of the supposed sprint is fired off? I guess that’s explained in a Harold Camping lecture on 8-track I must have inexplicably missed.

“So you’re siding with Hamas and Hezbollah and them terroristers, huh? Hate America, huh?”, they will say. Only not that eloquently. Guess what, Billy Bob Pentecostal? Some of us were standing firm against Israel’s collective holocaust of the Palestinian populace years, if not decades, before the current crop of gender-superfluous Gen-Zers took up the mantle, made some more protest signs, and romped about campus screeching about they know not what. Yes, there is no doubt that Hamas is a terrorist organization. But if Israel is so loath to have terrorists within its midst, perhaps it should stop creating them.

Not just indirectly, but directly.

By the late 1980s, Jewry’s longstanding hatred towards the Palestinian Liberation Organization, with its perfidious notions of a separate Palestinian state encompassing Gaza and the West Bank, had led Israel to lend sizable assistance to the formation of a “charitable, non-governmental” organization dedicated to relieving the misery particularly within Gaza, which had become well-established as the world’s largest and oldest continuous-use concentration camp. Christened ‘Hamas’ in 1987, the new polity was designed to act as a counterweight against the political machinations of the PLO and to hopefully win Palestinian hearts and minds back to their “natural” lot in life. This worked wonders until it didn’t. By 1988, Hamas had become thoroughly radicalized and was calling for no quarter shewn towards Israel in tandem with the equally militant but slightly older Hezbollah movement in southern Lebanon.

So….end of story, right? Hamas was now the implacable enemy of the Jewish state, forever and anon, and the IDF should now do what it ought to have done 35 years ago: venture forth and render this enemy of G-d into sawdust, yes?

Well….no. Because, y’see, there was a very important hitch. While Hamas undoubtedly did loathe Israel, it loathed the PLO and Yasser Arafat’s broader Fatah movement far, far more. They looked upon Fatah as a den of collaborationists and outright quislings, and as is the custom with schismatics everywhere they dedicated themselves to overturning the two-state framework of the 1994 Oslo accords almost as much as Israel itself did. What Machiavellian mensch could possibly resist tossing money at this golden obstructionist opportunity? Certainly not our hero Bibi Netanyahu, who during his sporadic yet lengthy sixteen-year tenure as Head Holy Land Honcho has been preeminent in providing covert financial and overt operational assistance towards Hamas – including and especially in its role as the duly-elected Palestinian government since 2006. This is even openly admitted by the native Israeli press.

So, yeah – if Baron Frankenstein insists on playing God and creating himself a Promethean golem that he fancies he can control, I’m not going to shed many tears if said golem proceeds to destroy everything near and dear to the Baron’s corrupted heart. Sow the wind, reap the whirlwind. But that’s the New Testament, so I guess our Greatest Ally won’t heed that.

And while we’re on the subject of winds sown and whirlwinds reaped: while the denizens of the “concert” – actually a rave – who lost their lives in the Hamas raid might have been innocent bystanders, at the same time it would appear that for them to situate their venue directly across a known danger zone and then flash laser beams in the night sky that could be easily mistaken for rocket contrails and/or directional beams to the uninitiated was a very, very foolish decision, to put it as charitably as possible. But some people just have to learn the hard way.

Perhaps the standout egregious phenomenon to be gleaned from this latest desert debacle from a Kinist perspective is how it once again reinforces the rank hypocrisy to be discerned within the ranks of Judeo-Churchianity – in this case, as regards Christian nationalism.

What has been the Church’s primary meme this past year – seemingly more in Reformed circles than in any other denomination? That’s right – the demonization of any and every manifestation of a desire to live under a Scripturally theonomic governing body as the epitome of racism, sexism, transphobeism, fascism, and all the other buzzwords they picked up in Attaining Ecumenism 101 during their seminary days. What they’re really pining for, of course, is an adoption of R2K precepts severe enough to give them the perfect excuse to embrace a Protestant version of monasticism, so that they can revert to an abbey located on a mountaintop to contemplate their navels and theology for the rest of their miserable lives. In that order.

We have seen Owen Strachan take the lead here in especially obnoxious fashion all summer and fall, as we at Tribal Theocrat have been diligent in documenting. His anathemas against the blasphemy of Christian nationalism have been legion. Yet how his tune changes when the topic is turned towards Jewish nationalism:

No, Owen, you aren’t rallying to the banner, but rather pronouncing your blessing upon an avowed ethnostate covertly embracing a theocratic telos by heralding it as that most holy of all polities – a Democracy. Have you displayed even a tenth of a yearning for a similar Christian polity that might even tolerate your presence, borderline heretical as it might be? And your calling it a ‘defined state’ is rich indeed, considering its borders have never been settled by any sort of treaty process and its jurisdictions are currently as spongy as the 200-year old roof rafters in a Puget Sound manor. When even the philosemitic glad-handing pyromaniac Doug Wilson can make you look like soggy Rice Krispies in a single post, you know your clout is cursory.

Of course, Strachan and his ilk’s brand of radical two kingdom theology is not the only one currently being used to justify Israel. The older and even more tiresome canard of the Jew being saved on account of his mistaken identity is once again enjoying a resurgence of late, as promulgated by the great blood mooner himself, John Hagee:

“I believe that every Jewish person who lives in the light of Torah, which is the word of God, has a relationship w/ God and will come to redemption…. trying to convert Jews is a waste of time. The Jewish person who has his roots in Judaism is not going to convert to Christianity …. Everyone else …. needs to believe in Jesus. But not Jews. Jews already have a covenant w/ God that has never been replaced by Christianity.”

There is no secondary kingdom so radical as one where the self-curse of ‘His blood be upon us and upon our children’ has been turned into an admirable precept of the Old Covenant, one embossed with its own salvific qualities. No denying that. I hope that the next time a learned rebbe walks by the Christian cemetery where Hagee’s mother is interned and urinates on her grave, in accordance with Talmudic principles, the good pastor will bless his elder brother in the ‘faith’ for his tremendous fortitude.

But whichever side of the heretical hedge these people choose to alight upon, their primary worldview can be summed up in the words of the X/Twitter satirist BoomerCon Baptist:

And who can argue with that sentiment? Especially since doing so is likely to land you with a hefty fee, jail time, and/or loss of your life in this overheated cultural climate? Meir Kahane is spinning in his grave now, but only so he can bore out of his coffin and join in the Zio-party.

And so, as we settle back in our comfy chairs to watch this latest season of Apocalypse Net on our smartphone screens, while Anthony Blinken scurries about reassuring the world that he’s Jewish over and over again while Joe Biden chimes in with ‘yeah, same with me’, while Volodymyr Zelenskyy begs for borscht outside his Miami condo and assures all passersby that he used to be famous until circumstances took away his fifteen minutes, and while Bibi does his best to translate Dr. Strangelove into Hebrew, let us ponder the full ramifications of what Jesus’s cursing of the fig tree meant. But not out loud, of course, lest a humiliated, embittered, and vengeful Mossad turn its electronic ears our way.

1Except for a brief period of time when they were claiming that the missile had actually just damaged the parking lot and that casualties were quite minimal, perhaps even non-existent, before grudgingly accepting losses. But, hey, the fog of war can cloak an entire army corps of lies.