By Colby Malsbury

Hey, everybody! Welcome to a brand-new decade!

What’s on tap for the Roaring Twenties 2.0? Given the latest hysterical historical revisionism making its way to the top of the Outrage Charts, more of the same manufactured SJW angst that made the previous ten years such a delight to endure. Weren’t we supposed to be having Disney cruises to Mars by now?

And just as the perceived entry of hundred year old books, songs, and movies into the public domain often elicits a renewed interest in their contents (though the actual time frame is ninety-five years), so too do the centenaries of past ‘injustices’ elicit a renewed outburst of indignation from professional meddlesome Care Bears. The only thing easier than pouring forth one’s heart towards ethnic strangers afar off is to do so towards ethnic strangers afar off and dead long before one’s grandparents were born. In that spirit, the closing months of 2019 saw the seedbed being prepared for a crop of poisonous forget-me-nots commemorating the Tulsa Race Massacre of May-June 1921. Interestingly enough, the event was better known as the Tulsa Race Riots for decades, but as blacks historically possess the unsavory proclivity towards anarchy during tense periods the moniker was duly altered to its current exploitative form. Doubtless the new name is also meant to covey impressions of that old paean to white inhumanity The Texas Chainsaw Massacre – especially given how Oklahoma is indistinguishable from Texas to your average Left Coaster. When the game is semantics, the play is always based on cutthroat poker rather than Go Fish. read more