America has a problem with modesty. It’s absent.
Females are not the only ones who dress immodestly, but theirs is the most notable, and they are the most marketed by our immodest culture. Sadly, the way Christian women dress is hardly distinguishable from the way pagan women dress. Many of them strive for Britney, not beauty, So, let’s get down to the nitty gritty.
The Underwear Factor
Let’s start with the premise that it is immodest for a woman to wear her underwear in public. Let’s move on and ask what the practical difference is between a bikini and underwear. Both cover the same areas on the body, and neither leaves any more to the imagination of some poor peeper than the other. A bikini in public is underwear in public. Therefore, it is immodest to wear a bikini in public.
What about a one-piece. Well, is it modest to wear underwear to the beach but with an extra piece of clothing wrapped around your midrift? Okay then. The exposed bellybutton and lower back are not the criteria for immodest attire. It is immodest to wear a once-piece in public.
So these two bathing suits are immodest because of the underwear factor. The only escape is to deny the premise that underwear in public is immodest. Any takers?
The Hot-Dipped Factor
It is popular today for women to have stretchy pants required as their work uniform. From waiters to office girls, hot-pants (as my wife calls them) are popular. And who can deny he has seen a girl wearing a pair of jeans that looked like they were hot-dipped on her legs and rear? The tight pants (or a tight blouse) are not underwear, and they do not reveal skin, but they do reveal the areas of the body that are unseemly in public contexts. A woman’s bosom and rear are for her eyes and her husband’s eyes. Period. Therefore, she must not expose them either by revealing them bare or by hot-dipping a thin layer of cotton or denim around them. Yoga pants at work are an abomination.
I am baffled that Christian men let their wives out of the house showing their bodies to every man who would glance. Why would a man not care about his daughter wearing underwear to the pool? Why does he not care about the shame that is brought on her, him, and Him, when his wife displays every curvy asset of her body through intentionally thin fabric?
How Tight is Tight?
It’s difficult to make modesty standards, but here’s a helpful rule of thumb with tight clothing: When you can make a true-scale plaster caster mold of your body parts with your clothes on, your clothes are too tight.
What about Skirts?
So far I think we have been pretty straightforward without being legalistic. Letting men see you you in your underwear or clothing which seeks to expose rather than to cover your unseemly parts is inappropriate, careless, and immodest–which is unlawful.
This is the controversial part, so I’ll make it brief and allow you to draw your own conclusions. The Bible seems to make the exposure of the thigh tantamount to nakedness (see Ex. 28:42; Isa. 47: 2,3). There are many objections however, and here is an interesting discussion on this. Obviously certain skirts reveal partial thigh, and granting the validity of the “thigh” argument, these skirts would make the woman naked. I haven’t studied that issue in detail, but it does seem that at a point in history God deemed women (and men) naked who exposed their thighs. One might want to make the argument that that was a cultural standard which doesn’t carry over culture to culture. If so, fine, but given what the thigh means to our sexually perverse culture, I would prefer my wife only show her thighs to me.
And it’s quite awkward to see your wife’s thighs, I might add.
Thoughts, Questions and Conclusions
Here are some interesting thoughts and questions on which to reflect:
- How do you other men feel about your wife exposing her thighs to other men? Her body parts through intentionally tight clothing? Frankly her whole body at the beach or pool? Do you care?
- Isn’t it interesting that the goal of women seems to be to try to show as much skin as possible without actually undressing, and to try to get their clothes as tight and revealing as possible without actually showing skin? This seems to suggest that they are uncomfortable being covered! How strange and twisted.
- I frequently see prostitutes in urban areas leaving work who are not as immodestly dressed as the women walking the downtown college campus, the women on duty at restaurants (Cheeseburger Paradise), the women at the mall, etc. I’m dead serious. What characterizes a prostitute today is not skin or tight clothing, but things like early wrinkles, drugged-over eyes, a provocative strut, and disheveled hair. Church girls’ clothing is much the same as non-prostitutes, which is to say these former women like to advertise but not sell.
- Ladies, modesty might cost you. If you cannot desert your bikini, your skin tight clothing, if you cannot restructure your wardrobe and learn to cover rather than to reveal, you may not be fit for the kingdom. Jesus warned about those who wish to do battle for him: they must count the cost. The implication is that those who don’t will suffer great loss.
- Men, address the immodesty in your home. Love your wife, your daughters, your younger Christian brothers. Make it easier for these brothers to “flee youthful lusts.” Honor your King. Let’s keep the bodies our Christian sisters, daughters and wives, for their (future) husbands alone. Fight your cowardice. Do it Pro Rege, For The King.
Let’s wrap up (pun intended) with some observations and a call to action by Nancy Wilson (Credenda Agenda, page 10)
Women are careless in their ways when they dress in a manner that is too revealing. It doesn’t seem to matter how often modesty is addressed, the careless woman will continue to dress to please herself, which is often too provocatively. A careless woman may or may not know that she is bouncing along in her sweater or that when she sits down in her short skirt, too much is seen. If she knows and is wearing these clothes intentionally, she is careless. If she doesn’t know and would be horrified to find out, she is careless. Whether she is a teenager, a college student, a young mother, or even a grandmother, the standard is the same. Modesty is for Christian women of all ages. It is not something that comes into effect at age sixteen, after marriage, or after the third child. A careful woman dresses in a manner that not only demonstrates her obedience to God’s commands, but also shows a kind consideration for her fellow saints. When a Christian woman is dressed immodestly, it is at the very least an embarrassment, or a distraction to her fellow saints. At the most, it is a pastoral problem for the church.
Because of the rampant immodesty in the Church, it is no wonder some Christian women have resorted to dressing like prairie muffins in clothes that were in style in the covered-wagon days. Though they may look out of step with the modern world in a calico dress and bonnet, at least we cannot charge them with immodesty. I am not advocating dressing this way, but I am saying that an immodest “fashionable” woman has no grounds to make fun of her sisters in jumpers. If only we could learn to dress carefully, modestly, and beautifully. Certainly it must be possible.
Another thread wrapped up in the clothing issue with modesty is “gender differentiation.” Some of the “prairie muffin” types I know do not dress that way out of modesty issues alone. In a culture where God’s creation of TWO genders is being obliterated or blended, they seek to wear sometimes “overly feminine” clothing (by today’s standards) to delineate to sons and daughters growing up in an increasingly very confused world that we can celebrate “male and female created He them.”
Do you not ever stop to think that we women have to deal with guys dressing provocatively (modeling for underwear, playing soccer with shirt off, etc) yet we can’t do anything about it because men were taught in church that women don’t have sex drives? Do you know how many times I’ve had to go back to my room and masturbate? Didn’t know women did that? Honestly, this was one of the worst articles I’ve ever read. I don’t care if you look at my calves, butt, waist, stomach, or my whole naked body. I’m a doctor, and have a high-end job that should matter a whole lot more than what men think of my calves. I’m a fully functioning autonomous successful adult that’s not going to dress like a nun in 100 degree weather just in case some blog-writing guy gets a boner. I honestly don’t care if you do. Yes, you read that right. You all go to the beach showing your abs (the penis isn’t sexy-abs are the sexiest part of a male), and would rather not sit in the scorching hot weather in a shirt because women may find you sexy, so why should I? Get a boner. Masturbate. Get it out of your system. You go do that, and I’ll still save lives and have a real job, learning how to control my sex drive without freaking out every time a person walks by provocatively. Grow up.
Thank you Katie Taylor. That was awesome. Totally agree.
You are right, of course. We need modesty like a fish needs water. Let’s bring it back.
*You’re wrong, of course.
Absolutely, healthy attitudes on sex and the human body of either gender go a hell of a lot further than trying to pretend covering one gender up to prevent lust in the other. A body is a body, everyone has one and if other people like what they see, great! Just as the shirtless guy in your analogy isn’t asking to be accosted over it, nor is a woman showing calves, or thighs, or boobs, or any other part of their bodies. Modesty is what you make it, finding body parts to be sexual is what you make it. So good on you Katitaylor! You are a fantastic example of how to handle arousal in a realistic and healthy way!
I think you’ve completely missed the point. With all due respect, I don’t care how high your sex drive is – it WILL NEVER BE AS STRONG AS A MAN’S. EVER!!! I don’t doubt you struggle with an addiction, as I do, but you’d REALLY be helping us out if you changed your wardrobe from tights to sweats, for example.
And I think you’re gravely mistaken about guys, yes some dress inappropriately, obviously!! But there aren’t NEARLY as much of them as women dressing inappropriately. You know that. God bless.
Hey Katie,
My mom always said if anything will come out of a woman’s mouth, anything will go in.
…you’ve told us a valuable secret: women admire a man’s abs (presumably, it’s a sign of a man’s discipline and ability to be a provider). Fine.
Now here what makes a woman beautiful: While having an attractive body is important, what’s better is a quiet and chaste spirit, and cleverness and a dedicated willingness to help – no doctor’s salary can give a woman these traits if she doesn’t have them already.
My advice to you: In the future, watch your mouth, especially when you’re addressing a man.
Honestly I’ve never read anything more sexist and disgusting in my life.
I can say without blinking an eye that you are definitely going to hell.
If you are married, I feel so bad for your spouse. Jesus would be ashamed of you. And you aren’t a christian, Judging someone or telling someone that they need to “shut up” is not godly. And I response to this article, Dude you are nasty. If i was ever married to someone who expressed these kinds of thoughts or put these rules on me…well I would divorce his ass. Modesty can come in moderation not always in extreme. You are only looking at the extreme cases. No its not okay to walk out in a g string or nude. But as long as nothing is hanging out, everything is fine. Has it not crossed you’re mind that every woman is different. What is modest for one woman can be totally immodest for another, Plus some women have problems such as big bust, high temp, heavy thighs, big butt. And your going to yell at someone who obviously is having trouble. God is ashamed of you. And a woman wearing pants is not going to hell, the person telling them that is going to hell. A woman who keeps her mouth shut and lets a MAN decide what she should wear “When men know literally NOTHING about a womans body or the problems she may face with her body or whats comfortable to her” is a weak sad probably depressed woman with little or no hope for a happy good life.God says that a womans body is meant for her husband, well I know many women that will not and don’t get married. Whats the rules for women who will never get married? Do they have to become nuns? If you say yes than I feel very sorry as no one will respect you for that answer. This is my opinion and you are very much entitled to yours. But you cannot judge women who are not of your religion or do not follow the same standards. I am a christian woman. I know Jesus will love me no matter what I wear. I don’t wear “Slutty” things. Maybe in christian’s eyes “Yes”. But modesty [ as in the you have to dress a certain way to be modest] to me is stupid. Putting this shit on women is disgusting when its the “MANS” fault. If a guy has a problem with my bare arm or some of my thigh or my neck and shoulders showing then I would suggest he should get counseling..as he is probably a sex addict or he’s a hormone raging teen or a pervert. If you can show a place in the bible that says “you shall not wear a sleeveless shirt” in those exact words then I’m not listening. Men should be controlling their self’s just as I will not wear a tube top and a mini skirt that shows off EVERYTHING. It’s all about moderation. If a girl can not show even a hint of cleavage than a guy can not take off his shirt..EVER. So if men are not ready to deal with the same rules as women then they can’t say ANYTHING about how a woman dress …period. As a women I’ve had men tell me to shut up. Guess where their asses ended up…In jail. I’m not saying that you cant have a opinion I’m just saying you just judge women who do not believe in the same things as you. And some guys don’t care what their wives wear. All I can say is I’m one of those women who is never getting married. Because men are pigs and treat women like crap. END OF STORY
Shotgun, The words that came out of your mother’s mouth was about as disgusting as anything I’ve ever heard. If she is right, I can’t imagine what she puts in there (thankfully she is wrong because that visual is just disgusting).
Wow! I mean really wow! You know what is good for a woman OR a man? How about being respectful of others. You have absolutely no right, ever, to dictate to anyone how they should live their life. What a sad place to be in to have to dictate to others how they should treat you all based on biological plumbing. How weak to feel the need to oppress another gender, or anyone really. Hopefully in the time you have left in this life you will gain some maturity and learn you are just one in trillions of other lives and no more important than any of them. One can only hope you learn that your procreative parts are just bits of meat, no more important than that. Katie, being a doctor, likely has had to work harder than you could possibly imagine to gain her position. That right there deserves respect. The fact you would minimize that purely because of her reproductive organs means you missed the boat on what is important in life. Further the fact she succeeded to try and keep people healthy and safe and to save lives speaks more for her than you telling her to have “a quiet and chaste spirit, and cleverness and a dedicated willingness to help”. What tripe. How about you develop a quiet and chaste spirit, and cleverness and a dedicated willingness to help instead.
And my advice to YOU: In the future, watch your mouth, especially when you’re addressing a woman.
One can be completely naked and still be modest depending upon the context of the situation. Modesty varies vastly between cultures. For example in societies where the climate is very hot and humid like in the Amazon jungle and people don’t have modern technology like air conditioners it is commonly acceptable and modest for people to wear very little clothing if any at all.
Nice comment! I wrote a similar thing.
I agree with this article and all the people disagreeing in the comments’ section are just barbarians.
I often volunteer as a lifeguard, as I am certified. No way I could save any drowning victim if I wore a long dress to the pool. Somehow I think God is a little more pleased with me using my skills where they are needed and saving lives, rather than getting heatstroke and sitting by while someone drowns. Or should we all stop swimming too? This mentality of women being responsible for men’s sins needs to stop. Men, take responsibility for your own thoughts and sins. Heaven forbid paramedics cut my shirt off to save my life and a man happens to be present. Sorry for making you sin by almost dying.
Kay has missed the point of modesty in a general sense & reached all the way to the ‘what about rape’n’incest’ parallel to the topic. Not only does it not fly, it drowns.
-tkbk-
Wow so, I got linked here from a joke article about “butt sin” found here (http://matthewepierce.com/butt-sin-volume-2/). I thought this would be a joke (and I mean it is, in the sense that you believe this stuff), but now that I’ve read some of this stuff and seen how you’re a baptized version of Sharia Law, I wish I could take my web traffic away from your site. I guess that’s the drawback to linking to misogynist trash on the web: people inadvertently give you upticks in traffic when they say “What? No way can that possibly be a real thing that exists. Do actual human beings believe this crap?”
So please consider this my honorary “I request to have my web visit revoked” vote. Peace, I’m out.